Random Blah ....

When I started writing here, I had almost promised myself to be regular. Hmmmm.. I am not that bad at keeping promises.Am I?Come on ! I didn't write for 6 days so its ok ??

And as it is I have nothing substantial to write these days.I am quite upset with the way I have been blogging.It's turning out to be a purely self centred blog whereas I had planned to write about so many things like books films,politics , current affairs and nothing is happening right now!!

I guess I am not in the correct frame of mind. well !! When am I ever in my senses?

Anyways, I am still sulking over that cancelled trip to Delhi.But I am still hopeful.Lol :D

Diwali was ok, got a great chance to eat so many mithais and arghhh i have to compensate by exercsing more and more as I have a terrible sweet tooth. Diwali was low profile, as it is mood was off as the plans to celebrate it in delhi got chaupat! Ok,now I have to come out of this festive mood.

Its been a while that I have not read a book or written something new.Too bad ! Dont know whats happening. I dont remember where I kept Robin Sharmas Book.Its high time I finish reading it and yes I have to begin my preparation for MBA entrance exams.Though all my books are in Delhi, I have to brush up my vocab and reading,maths,LR and GK :-(.

(in short EVERYTHING)

I had planned to read extensively on HR too from the web and make notes.God alone knows when will that shubh mahurat come!!

I am getting back to my lazy lethargic mood & lifestyle and I don't want it to happen.

It wont continue for long as I cant risk my future because I know if I lose time I will spoil my own life, no one elses.

Enough for now. Go get a life girl !!!

My 23hrs of Happiness....

I dont know how to start this post... Ummm, I am sad, I am disappointed...

Almost every one who knows me can blindly guess that the greatest piece of good news for me will be my trip to India.And that happend yesterday !!

No, not the trip .. but the plans to go to Delhi ....

Got an unexpected call from family early morning ...

had to rush back to Delhi urgently, got our tickets,shopped on last moment and completed all the travel formalities.in short I was all set for our departure... I guess I was the happiest person on earth yesterday.I was jumping around in joy with excitement.Yup like a monkey.

I had started chalking out my schedule and things to do once I reach Delhi like making surprise calls to friends on arrival and was dreaming of celebrating Diwali there in presence of entire family after 17 years.

and today i think I am the saddest :( person

I dont feel like writing details as I get bugged thinking about my shattered plan:-(. Status quo is that me not going ....

GOD ... I had packed all my stuff and cancelling the trip on last moment was heartbreaking.

My Extreme Bad Luck !!

No Diwali .. no surprise calls .... booooooo :(( mummmyyyy

some one please come with the magic wand ... I wana go .... I wana go..I dont wana unpack my luggage.... :'( (yes,me's crying )

OK .. I Stop now.. I am not a baby , I am not crying any more. Perhaps god really wants something better so he delayed or cancelled this for us .

BUT GodJee , me's waiting in hope!!..... I am in queue, when's my turn ?Thank you for giving me 23hrs(got a call to come to India at 10 am and next day got a call at 9 am not to come) of happiness. but next time please make sure it materializes.

Hmmm ,anyways the purpose of me writing all this is that,I guess I have learnt a few lessons From this Experience.

1.Its not always Good to get so excited. Excess of Everything is bad ..

2.You cant be God AND you dare not try to challenge God.

3.and sometimes(in my case all the times :P) when you really want something to happen .. you have to wait patiently till it finally comes true...

4.And I should learn to control my emotions. I get overwhelmed too fast.

not so good !!

ok .. end of this drama post...lets see when the next chance pops up !! God jiee .... AAP SUN RAHE HO NA?

My Pre-Diwali Outing

Another day has gone. As a pessimist I can say that yet another boring and futile day came to an end and as an optimist (which I am) I can say that I passed another day with hope and faith in the anticipation of good days to come. It is very essential to keep your cool when you are in disdain and most importantly you should never lose the four letter magical mantra spelled Hope.
And yes you should not just sit with hands on hands, doing nothing and say that I am hoping. At least try to work towards a better day.
Ummmm well my post title is diwali outing and what am I writing, LOL. I was building the background for this.
Yesterday I was invited for a Diwali Lunch organized by a ladies kitty club here.
I tried my level best to reach as late as I could. Hehe. I am very averse to attending these kinds of gatherings. Almost every member was double my age and mind you if address them as Aunty; they can kill you for committing such a sacrilege.

Diwali functions organized abroad are a treat for everyone. You get to eat all these home made Indian mithais in wholesale (they are a luxury for Indians abroad)
You get to go out and attend these functions and parties for a week etc. So you have some thing to look forward to in your otherwise staid and low profile lifestyle. Not to forget these dear aunties(ok overgrown girls)get a perfect opportunity to flaunt their riches by showing off their diamonds and designer clothes. (Sorry aunties, If you read this, but I am sure you will never get time to read this, you must be busy socializing, right?)

I loathe attending these parties here. No, don’t presume that I am not an outgoing person or an introvert. I am very garrulous by nature; I can promise you if you’re a normal person, you can have a good time in my company.
But these social parties here…. Damnnnn :(
Actually I am always bombarded with some fixed questions.
Oye Gul beta?? You are still here? When are you going back to Delhi? (arghhhhhhhh I wish I knew too auntyyyy!!)
And what do you do the whole day? Do you cook? You did your last diploma in tele communications na? … uff no, aunty ji Corporate communication !
Oh yea yea… same to same.
Come over sometime beta. (aunty if you are home I surely can come but Mondays and Thursdays you are out for kitty, Tuesday for ladies path … and Wednesday for Cards party… so when should I come??)

Well, I know and I fully understand that this is just a courtesy they extend. I can’t expect aunties to talk about my interests, Right? And it is a rarity that I can ever have a meaningful conversation with some one out there. It’s just a mere hi hello and bye … go die!!
Time gets over saying hi hello to everyone... You spend 2-3 minutes with everyone and its time to eat lunch/dinner and rush back (I am always in a hurry to rush because I never have any motivation to stay longer).

Though I must confess that chatting with different kinds of people is an enlightening experience.I get to learn so much. For example- here the ladies and kids in general are happy and contented in lives, ignorant about soooooo many things and issues that I feel they should be aware of.

On the other hand when i meet some veryyyy knowledgeable scholarly types people, I get a complex.I was better off with that complex man ! I had inspiration and motivation to be as informed as them.But I am yet to meet an inspiring person in town here...

Hmmm! Well, summing up my outing was a good change (not a welcome change though).Played some interesting games and watched the ladies shake a leg on wheres the party tonite. (that was hilarious… shhhh )

If I attend 2-3 more kitty parties as a guest,(mind you I am not a memberrrr!!) I surely will come back pulling my hair!! Sorry I have better things to do!

Dilli ki sardi!!

The weather today reminds me of Delhi :-(… It's getting pleasant and cold here, another fortnight and we will need warmers. And all my woolen stuff is lying back home in Delhi. So does this mean I will go back? :D:D

Hayye I wishhhhhhhhhhh….
Winters in Delhi were great fun. The only nightmare was taking bath. It was merely a formality to bathe in winters. Here be it winters or summers, you cannot take bath in cold water, you just can’t!!Central heating system keeps the house and bathrooms everything warm and cozy, it’s only when you step out that nani yaad aati hai… your nose becomes red like tamaatar and the hand movements are like robots. (ie you only move them if needed …)
Delhi was nothing less too. Though its much much colder here but what makes Delhi winters so intolerable and nani yaad dilaa de types is the fact that we don’t have all those heating facilities and arrangements that we have abroad. Yes you can put those heaters on but you need to have electricity which is a scarcity. LOL
Once me and my friend were commuting in auto rickshaw, it was early December and my goodness! we were literally screaming because that dry cold wind was unbearable. Here we have no autos, all cabs... but anyways here I have no where to go unlike Delhi.

Delhi winters meant – going to Delhi haat, eating pakoras and samosas at home, sipping coffee or tea 5-6 times in a day, eating halwa, rolling your selves in blankets 24x7. It was a torture to getup early morning & getting ready for college… and that damn fog which hampered visibility…
Here we used to go to school be it -5 and in Delhi, the moment temperature drops down to 1 or 2 the government announces off …chalo some respite for otherwise over burdened Delhi school going kids.

Another one month and its fun time in Delhi, with all those small and big time events and shows organized in the malls and cultural centres across the centre. In fact now that diwali and eid are approaching all the markets would be glitzy and decorated.

Over crowded Connaught place, India gate and Bengali market; sigh … sitting here I can just dream and imagine what all is going on there. :-(

Here all I can do is go out to a park if I want to and watch the kids swinging and their moms talking. It will be a treat to watch the snowfall and make snowmen in the garden and throwing snow balls on cars and men like water balloons the way we do it on Holi. Bad manners I know … hehe but I used to do that as a kid not anymore.

Life’s very different here.

The best thing about India is no matter how rich or poor you are, there is still some happiness on your face (at least I think so). Sadly here I feel that all people are living an over stressed and depressing lifestyle. Kissi ke chehre peh khushi nahi hai ….. Hmmm that reminds me of a song is sheher mein har shaks pareshaan sa kyon hai!!

Anyways no two nations can be alike and NOTHING can compete with the uniqueness of India and its people… I miss you India …. !

Mujhse Shaadi Karoge- A letter to my prospective Husband

Well, as I earlier said that I will surely post my writings and poems, its now time to post my imaginary letter to my imaginary husband.

I wrote it about two months back.

And the Man hunt is still on ....mujhe koi jaldi nahi hai, its my family whos religiously pursuing this issue... Goodluck to them !!

here it goes...

My Dear Mr. Would be (husband)…
Hello! Who are you? Where are you? I am sorry I am not going to ask you how you are and get into your health issues… precisely, because I still don’t know you and THIS is the irony of my life... “I don’t know you... Yet your absence plays an important part in my life.”
Now let me get to business. As I earlier asked you... Where are you and who are you? In which part of the planet earth do you exist? What do you do for a living? Are you a doctor? Engineer? Businessman? Lawyer or professor? Ummm any more professions left out…ok... a sportsperson? An accountant? Blah blah blah. Who are you yaar?
Do you have any idea or clue about how eagerly everyone in my family is awaiting your grand entry in their lives? (Actually it should be my life… but they are keener. seems they will be happier than me if and when I get married). In this letter of mine I am beseeching you on their behalf to come quickly and give them some peace of mind. What you are going to read ahead might convince you to do so. So here is my jeremiad.
My parents keep on talking about you very often. They discuss your nature, stature, and looks-vooks. Well all presume you are pretty tall. (It’s but obvious I can’t marry a dwarf… even though even a normal guy would look like Lilliputian standing next to me. God!! Why am I 5feet 10inches short???). They talk about anything and everything about you. In short they look forward to you as the most eligible bachelor!
You really are unaware about the developments here. You indeed don’t know how desperately everyone is, to hunt you down. Be it parents, grandparents, relatives, friends... it seems the whole world is conspiring against you and me to unite. What’s more amusing is the dedicated interest that these aunties take in you. They never forget to remind us that it’s high time I should tie the knot as good guys like you are rare. I presume it’s their birth right to interfere in others lives on pretext of suggestions and advice. All thanks to them, they have given shivers to the entire family with stories of how bad the world is and how we girls are getting carried away by filmy duniya etc etc. and not to forget… the manner in which they terrorize all on my growing age. I wonder is it ever too late to get married?
Talking about grandparents, well I blame the old age and generation gap for their stance. They believe that marriage is the ultimate aim in life and it should happen as soon as possible. Why don’t they get us married when we are born? Now let me warn you a bit.
Come fast... Come as soon as possible.
My granny has many other competitors lined up for you. One is from the US, the others from nearby Canada (Doctor), yesterday she was talking about a wrist watch distributor in Delhi. So you better watch out. I wonder what’s taking you so long to appear. Are you busy with work or girlfriends? Or like me you too think it’s a little early to get married?
Well. Sitting here I all I can do is just presume or suppose the probable cause of your delay in our lives.
But trust me you are sought after big-time here. They enquire about you to anybody possible. They are leaving no stone unturned. My relatives have gone berserk. Every one has their own valid reasons for our early and divine union. Aunties will grab this golden opportunity of buying all those outfits and jewelry that they dreamt of flaunting. Uncles too will have the time of their lives hitting on girls their daughters’ age and boozing as if the excise department will ban liquor after our marriage. My cousins too have gone nuts. All they want is an occasion to dance and tease your sisters (do you have one???)
Are these reasons not adequate and persuasive enough for you to think over and walk into our lives?? Or should I justify my plight too?
Before that let me ask you… do you also face the same wrath at home? Are you not pestered? If you are, then please suggest how you handle them yaar! As I too need some tips badly.
Believe me day by day it’s getting embarrassing for me and I can’t stand it anymore. They make fun of me as if I am the perpetrator for your delay. Have some shame! How can you silently view your wife -to -be in such a state of misery and disdain? See I am being frank and honest to you from the scratch. Why don’t you come out and help me?
You are absolutely ignorant of my mental agony. (Oops don’t deduce that I am mad or a moron. I am not mental but I surely am getting sentimental)
I just want to tell you that just because we both have to get married soon (amen!!!????) (How soon or late even I don’t know... depends on your fateful arrival) no one allows me to do anything. I want to pursue further studies, but your late entry is the hindering cause. They say you are on your way hence I cannot go to college anymore. (Bewakoof!! budhi ho ke shaadi karegi… that’s what I hear when I say I want to do MBA.)
When I say that I want to take music sessions, I am advised I should learn to cook for you (do we get married to cook??). When I say I want to work, they ask me to join them and the only job they assign is to get tea or print a document. I am not permitted to hang out with friends as they might provoke me against you. Just because you too might be attending XYZ s wedding or party, I should dress up to impress you in first glance (hinting that am all ready and available for marriage) and this is not it. Since you might not like a slightly-little over weight (I just need to shed three-four kgs man!!), wheatish complexioned girl (I am tanned); I should diet, diet and die and visit parlors.
Are these reasons not considerable?
Are you still not impressed by me? I have given up my food, education, friends and hobbies for you and you are missing. How do I tell you that each decision pertaining to my future revolves around you? I wonder my hopes and I will die a premature death if you take any longer to arrive and if this is the case, I curse you -you will be me and I will be you in next life (sorry… I am really perturbed).
Can I ask you one more thing? I am sure you too do things that I wouldn’t like or approve but does anyone stop you? No, isn’t it? You indisputably are leading an envious bachelor life then why do I have to suffer? Why should I waste my time speculating your auspicious entry in my life (oops... my life is not my life anyways…u know what I mean?)
And by the way don’t get over attached to your girl friend that you will have to comprise for me. I am not as generous as Preity Zinta to let u go off!! (Sigh! pehele milo toh sahi!!)And I guess I have the requisite confidence to not let you go away. Ha-ha... I am not being pompous; I am just trying to elucidate that it’s high time you meet me! Let’s not play any more hide and seek. If you enjoy the game so much I promise we will play it with our kids. For now I am fed up of being the denner.
Come soon... For anyone’s sake!! Come fast my dreams are getting crushed daily!
Ok now the final word.
Come fast IF you will let me study.
Come fast IF you love music and would allow me to sing.
Come fast IF you respect women for what they are and not preach what they should be or do.
Come fast IF you can guide me to be a better person.
Come fast IF you have an aim and I can support you to attain it.
Come fast IF you too need me and believe that I can standby you through thick and thin.
Come fast IF we are meant to be together… in short come fast IF we can be happily married and help each other realize your, mine and our dreams.

And if not … then BETTER LUCK NEXT TIME!!(As I don’t want my future to be a replica of my present. The present –where life seems futile, uninteresting and each day a burden to live)
Till then take care and enjoy life.
Once again I plead you to come soon. (Subject to conditions mentioned above: P)

Yours Hopefully…..

(P.S- if you are not the one, then kindly circulate this to people whom you think fall under this category and would be interested.)

Dated – till we meet (or I get married to someone else!!)!!

Poetry Time...

It’s time to post some poems of mine on the blog, I have written quite a few of them. And anyone can make out after reading them that Goddddddddd!! I am so self centered. The poems are always about me and stuff revolving around me. (Who cares at least I am poetic (says whoooo??????))
Hmmmm! well I want to begin by posting my poem on the topic Blogging: P!! Here it goes …


To blog or not I have always thought...
As so many ideas I have got!

Long ago a friend told me that she blogged
And told me to do so but my mind used to get clogged

As for me it didn’t have much relevance then
But slowly and steadily the process began

I felt strongly about certain issues
With no one to listen to me, I used to cry with tissues

Things around me made me volatile and sensitive
All I could do was just fume and get pensive

I started writing poetries and stories
That depicted me, my views, life and worries

Blogging will help me share and learn
With this, life will take a new turn

So I thought it’s high time to blog now
But things kept me away some how

Better late than never as I always say
I am going to write occasionally if not everyday

From blah blah on life and views in general
To topics like God, friendship and love which are eternal

I embark on the mission to express “Me”
How far I reach we will see!!

Let’s communicate… let’s begin
Blogging is an ocean and I am here to swim
________________________
I will soon type my poems on me missing Delhi and a special poetic intro of me!!

Blabbering again ...

Jalebis and ladoos to accompany evening tea!! Wow!!
Yes …:D:D:D I had jalebis today... That too, from Delhi. heeehahahahah
A passenger brought almost everything for us from India… except for samosas and golgappas. LOL I was too shy to ask my folks to send all this stuff too…
Once upon a time I could half kg jalebis in a shot and now I can’t have one piece even araams se (diet conscious … blushes)
And tomorrow we gona have sarson ka saag and makki ki roti!! Balle balle ji !
Man... I miss India big time…Why do I miss India??

because I love India
Because my best friends are there… I don’t have a single person whom I can call as a friend over here :-(
because I miss the food there.....
Because I miss the life, the raunak, those busy streets …. Those crowded markets…
Becuase I miss those bumpy rikshaw rides…
Because there was so much you could do there...
And because I can go on and on and write why I miss India.

Last night we had an argument over my marriage (nothing new) I was like listen folks.. Ok get me married any where... Usa, UK, Guantanamo bay, Antarctica BUT… no matter wherever I live all my life… I want to die in India!! And they were like ya sure why not as if you are a Nehru or Gandhi!!
Later, I was thinking- Gul, you may live in India & enjoy all the comforts that you wanted (eat golgappas watch movies... go to chandni chowk,karol bagh and all your regular dens) yet you might not get the guy your type and it could be the either way too that you are living abroad with a guy your type.
So whats better?
I can’t decide yaarrrrrrrrrr!!
But surely it’s more important to get a good life partner rather than thinking about what you can eat or do.
There something called adjustment and change. And I have to understand sooner or later that change is the only constant in our lives. So Miss Gul, keep an open mind…

Marriage Blues-Ghantee baj gayi !!!!

Getting married is one of the most beautiful things that happens in any ones lives. It’s one of the most crucial decisions that can make or break your future.But but but!! The pre marital tension is one of the most horrendous experiences.
Pre marital tension: P lol I can define it as the anxiety, tension and the countless questions that pop up in your mind before you say “ I do” or “kabool hai” to someone.
This is a part and parcel of an arranged marriage.

You have to go through it… everyone goes through it…. And I guess I am the latest victim of this pre marital blues syndrome. Man it’s inevitable. This time my concern is genuine because for the first time ever my parents have forwarded my profile to the boy’s side. Generally it’s vice versa! And beta! If the guys side says yes means main toh gayi !!ab tera kya hoga Gullu baby:-(
Arranged marriage is a pure gamble. If you are lucky you get the partner of your choice and god forbid if things go wrong you end up compromising all your life.The entire process of arranged marriage is amusing and honestly it irks me.I know in the age of shaadi.com and guy meet girl types this all sounds passé but it is an indomitable fact that even today the decision rests with the parents (with majority of communities in India).

The parents from both the sides do enquiry, pooch taach,
For example the girls’ side would ask –kitna kamaata hai kya khaata hai? Sharaab peeta hai ? koi ladki ka chakkar vakkar?
And the guys side will surely ask – cooking jaanti hai ?gharelu hai ?dominating hai ya suppressible hai?sundar hai? Susheel hai ….
Well after the guys and girls sides are fully satisfied and the enquirys over; a meeting is fixed. There’s the mooh dikhai. The boy sees the girl; the girl is too shy to look up even :P
They are told you can go for a walk or a round but come back in 10 min or 30 min or 1 hour.99.99% of the cases the answer is a sure short Yes after they come back from that formal round!Dare they say no because the family reputation is at stake. And then it’s Badhaai ho jee!! rishta pakka hogaya!
Now I wonder how much can you understand or judge a person in a matter of 30 minutes. It’s not like interviewing a candidate for a job where you may give the job and if not satisfied fire the employee. And in some cases the guy/girl are not even allowed to talk. I have seen this happening with my friends. phewwwww!!
I remember as a 16 year old I once asked my relative about her experience.
She told me she blindly said yes without looking or meeting my uncle because Good and obedient girls are supposed to do that. I was clean bowled... and I could make this Yahoo smiley infinite number of times :O:O:O:O…… :O:O
And she told me Gul when your time comes, you too should do the same. I was again: O::O. I was like how could you say yes in a jiffy? God it’s your life too? And she just kept smiling at my inane questions calling me a kiddo and said you surely will understand when your time comes…and yes I have understood and I am not going to succumb to the situation (I hope).

This conversation took place 6 years back and today when the topic of my marriage pops up I am as involved as everybody else is. The difference is that though they all tell me final decision will be mine, I know deep down in my heart, I really cannot help it once the talks reach the final stage.
No probs if the guy says no, but how can I gather the guts if I my heart isn’t ready?
Sigh…. Pure gamble! This is when I recall my 12th class math’s lessons of probability. I hated it as much as I hate this entire process.

And by the way choosing (or zeroing on) a suitable match is another Herculean task!
Especially if you are a five feet ten inches tall girl with a little (if not much) brain and who knows what she wants from life. You know she isn’t a child who can be fooled or bribed with a chocolate to keep her mouth shut and watch. I wish choosing an ideal match could have been as easy as filling a form with tick marks and yes or no options.
But yehi tho fark hai shaadi is not an application form.

Now, I am often asked if I want to marry a boy who’s in service or business?
I am told that since you are from a business oriented family you may have to compromise a lot on daily basis if you decide for a guy in job. Are you read for it?
I m asked do I want to get married abroad? If I live abroad I won’t be allowed to visit my family back home in India very frequently and nor can they come to visit me. Moreover I won’t have the comforts of servants and part time maids that we all have in India. Another funny reason is the War on Terror. Lol. I am told if I get married in Delhi it self there might be a lot of unwanted interference of my relatives in my marital life.
And once I have kids, their admission and studies and quality of life in India everything is discussed. (God abhi shaadi hui nahi and bachon peh pahunch gaye)
Whenever I am bombarded with these questions and their expected answers my head goes zip zap zoom. I don’t understand whether they are helping me decide or confusing me?
I wish some one could guide me on this: - (. Marriage counseling anyone??
I might have my own misconceptions on some facts and I don’t want to ruin my life because of some pre decided notions.
But yes I am sure on certain things that I definitely want some one who values education and respects women. I believe a majority of guys in business (I m talking about an ordinary businessman not a Navin Jindal or Sachin Pilot!!!) have a faaltoo ka attitude and arrogance about their money and are overconfident.
Ok I agree you have money but you can’t buy everything with money!!
Insaan ke paas agar bahot paisa aajaye tho who sochta hai he can buy anything –insaan kya bhagwaan bhi . And I hate this attitude.
Yes I concur that you need a minimum amount for subsistence and a secured future, I am not saying I wan to marry a Saadhu ji but a human being should value money and decide how much is enough for him.
Now – the issue whether to marry a guy from India or abroad.
Well the family’s looking for a tall guy who should be educated and a qualified professional. now to get a boy taller than me with these credentials is veryyyyyyy tough from my community especially in India.
At times the guy is short… if he’s tall he’s just a graduate or too young barely my age.
Lol I don’t mean that I want to marry an oldie goldie… I am 22 so minimum 25-26:P
Isn’t it?
90% of the proposals that my parents get for me are from abroad. Now I am such an emotional fool who loves India and is over attached to Delhi that I can’t imagine living in usa or uk.
I am not afraid of change but I m sentimental about India.
Apna desh is apna desh after all!! My heart never agrees to go so far off. Though I know the kind of ideal boy that suits me and my family will be easy to hunt down in foreign countries yet my first priority is India always.
And last but not the least comes the criterion of looks!
Now I am told listen up Gul you aren’t a miss world or a beauty queen. So you have to compromise girl.
I know beauty is skin deep; you may have a beautiful face but an ugly heart…

Looks is the last criterion on my list. I know I can’t have the best of everything (especially in an arranged marriage) but but but no matter how good-looking or bad looking he is... My heart should say yes if he’s the one!!

And I suppose my wish list is getting endless so I better end it all here in the anticipation of Mr Right.
Jaane voh kaisa hoga re??? Sigh!!

I know there’s nothing much I can do, so there no point thinking about it. Jo hoga manzoore khuda hoga !! Amen

Title less post

Mere mann yeh bataa de tu …. Kiss aur chala hai tu ?
Kya payaa nahi tune… kya dhoond raha hai tu ?

Yup I am listening to this song……. Love will find a wayyyyyyyyyyyy jaaniye heeriye….
This song rocks! The lyrics are amazing. Ok I am not here to discuss this song.

Last night I gave my blog link to a friend and got some expert comments (the first ever comments on my blog ).Firstly I should strictly avoid the chat language that I use sooooo often in my posts. And, I should check my draft, edit it and enhance it,improvise before I finally post it.

In short I should be careful while I type because the essence of the message is lost due to the chat lingo and sms style.I have taken note of these comments and I am trying hard to follow it. It is not easy to let this chat style of typing go away so soon.I have been a chat addict for four yearssssssss!! Using short forms and abbreviations is part and parcel of my life and this is in my blood now Lol :D
I remember I had so much trouble in typing my assignments and editing them because of the chat slang.
Using wat for what . Good –gud. Friend as frns .
hmmmmmmm this is 0..000000000000001% of the entire chat history.
hehehe.....
Talking about Chat and internet, I will surely write about the world of good and bad that net did to me.
Now I am getting back to the books that I have to read.
BRB blog …: D hehehehe (I know chatting ka bhoot nahi utarege jaldi )

The Greatness Guide ~My Way

I started reading the book- THE GREATNESS GUIDE by Robin Sharma.What I like about his books is the simplicity with which he puts forward his thoughts. I wish I could write so easily. Unlike other motivational coaches he makes things so comprehendible.His books teach you about the little things in life that we all tend to neglect and in fact those lil things are the source of our genuine happiness.for example- when we get involved in our daily routine,jobs and hectic lives we simply forget about the things that gave us the real contentment and joy.

I remember singing was a passion for me( it still is & will always be) & once i started with my media course, life was soooooooooooooo busy that i never could get time to buy latest music or even listen to my own existing collection.( The irony today is that I want that kind of life back coz I am doing NOTHING substantial presently) but I wonder do all those great CEOs and people get time to read these books?Oh yea they can attend all those leadership seminars and conferences.

hmmmmm..I wish I had that kind of money (1000$ fr 1 seminar) to attend those classes ...goodness my wishlist is endless.ok at the end day of the day what i mean and want frm life is a positive outlook, interaction with optimistic people who fill you with good thoughts... thoughts that make you think and I believe once you start thinking, you are putting your brain to use, you learn to analyse the good,the bad and neutral and thats wat is very important- a proper analysis of issues and implementing the decision taken after analysing those keypoints.

you think - >you analyze- >you form a perspective-> and then you have vision and wisdom!!

I guess I am drifting far too much and getting preachy, never mind! as this is my space,i can go on and on ..LOL I surely will write more about this book and many more books later as I read it. I am too lazy to getup and go get the book from the other room else i would have started it right now!(noooooooooo i wont type the book... I am not dumb !! Ok I m not that dumb :P)

I want to maintain an account of my past experiences in personal and professional(ok ok i never went for a proper job but i still have a career!) life through this book.As you browse through the pages of the book, your brain starts scanning the experiences and lessons that you had learnt long ago but forgotten.thanx to books like these u bring them back in your life. Its like recovering the stuff from recycle bin :D in short .. we all need a GrEAtness guide - to simplify our lifes. The guide could be a person , a book,a past experience but whats important is to remember it all ur life and apply it whenever needed!!
Time to get some black tea now... I had a parantha today :-( cudnt resist the temptation. so now I have to take black tea with lemon to melt the fat. arghhhhh

and yessss!! I am being very dedicated to my blog by posting every day (be it crap even) lets see how long do i remain dedicated. I hope the craze remains .~~~~~

Blah Blah time Again !

I am doing what I love doing the most and that is "listening to songs".its 11 pm almost so i m being civilised enough not to disturb my neibhbours hence i m on headfones:D
doob gaya haiiiiiiiii jaise dard mein dil.... aasoon bhari hain ab aankhein ...LOL... no i mnot getting senti! these r the lyrics of the song tht i m lissenin to right now.. chalte chalte -frm the movie chalte chalte.Its one of my fav songs.n infact i seem to love the instrumental version more n more whenever i hear it( and tht is almost everyday)

those who know me well can surely bet tht i cannot live widout music.Ineed to be lissenin to something or the other. be it instrumental or vocal ...call it strange bt the kind of effect music has on me is beyond explanations !!
ok i ll try
ummmmmmmmm I dont know about others but music inspires me so much .It makes me feel positive, energetic n rejuvenates my soul:Dn i hve songs for all mooodz.frm heartbroken moments to dance floor numbers.. i hve them all. gosh my imagination n fantasytake such a toll whn i m lissenin to music( ahem ahem plz dont get ideas now !!)for example when i used to study fr exams i used to make it a point to lissen to my fav songs fr 1 hr atleasti used to get my optimism n energy back while i listend to em.i used to imagine of the good times i will have afr the exams r gona get over..go fr eating :D(mujh petu ko khaane ke siwa kuch soojhta nahi tha:P)or hang out.. or anything.and it really worked !!and it still does...
in short - I need music 24 x 7.I used to croon too. 24 x 7. but ab thoda kam ho chukka hai ... earlier i was alone so i cud sing fr my self ne time i wished to. now tht i live wid civilised ppl i avoid displaying my animal instincts .. :P so often singin se yaad aaya. till about 5-6 years back i used to dream of being a singer.i tried for those talent hunts too.. got selected but never went ahead fr sm or the other reason :(ok let me not bloviate ne more... doesnt look nice(blushes )
my mood right now is okkkkk :(.. not good not bad either. thanks to the songs they r keepin me alive.
Its been quite some time that i hve not read a book (berry bad girl!!) so i downloaded too ebooks:D sorry ppl .. i cant buy them ( no i mnot broke.Actually... we dont these books here where i live right now)Was browsing on google n got those two books that i wanted badly !! wow !!!one's love story by Erich Segal n the other ones Atlas shrugged.i am not sure if ll b able to read Atlas shruggeds pdf version.. it runs over 800 pages.n u need alot of attention and focus when u read Ayn Rands books..I remember when i was reading The Fountain Head; initially I thought everything is going above my head( ya ya .. sir se upar) but then i got into the mood and finished it in 5 days :D clap clap.
lets see how long i take to finish Atlas shrugged.
ok now end end of bla bla time !!
gudnite blog...

My Maiden post-Better late than never

Andddddddd i am off th mark!!!
It was the yr 2004 when i first heard about blogs(yup that late... blame it on my ignorance &lackadaiscal approach towards everything in life)ever since i gota know wat bloggings all about ... i decided ok.. sure!! i must write too. hmmmmm well first that hectic professional course in a media school kept me busy.. had no time from assingments, ppts, projects and blabla ... bloggin to door ki baat thi ...ok now it was feb 2005.. when suddenly my interest in bloggin was on the rise again n this time a frnd asked me.. gul do u blog?
me - no.frnd- u shld.. me - wat makes u so sure?friend- becoz u can write and u hve an opinion. n neone who has n opinion n has the basic skill of writin(be it third grade even) should blog.Moreover u can write poems , stories articles .. why dont u post them on a blog and let the world read..
me .. (thinkin... dimaag mein ghanti baji !!!!)frnd- come on .. i think u shld take it seriously.

anyways! once again i forgot everything abt blogs once this conversation got over.life after march 2005 got even more busier.. hectic.. n worrysome. with placments on r minds and last moment submission of dissertation and ad making..all i cud think was.. of runnin away to a hill station fr a change.in short dimaag kabhi khaali nahi tha.. kabhi sochne ki fursat hee nahi thi so.. 1 yr gone !!i finished my post grad... took up internship.. quit it... strted preparing fr mba entrances! bloggin??? naaaaaa... still didnt blog !!
mba was a decision ..tht has still not reached a conclusion lol i mean i decided out of the blue widout much thought tht i hve to do mba.ok initially it wasnt a well thought decision , family thought i m evading the idea of marriage and since everyone is chasing the b school tag why shld i b left behind..but now i know why i want it.. how badly i want it n how happy i ll be if i get it ...status quo AS on 8th october 2006 is.. i m unemployed.. a velli and i m not doin mba at the moment..clap clap
CAT MAT SNAP FMS NMAT.. DSE i guess i tried almost all exams but result.. i guess u knw it. had i been studin in a b school now i wudnt hve been bloggin on all this.. even i wud hve flaunted n impressed the readers wid my newly invented HR ideas or marketing principles.. after all ek mba ka blog hota ... style tho hota hee (ok .. no offence.. all those who r pursuing mba or hve done mba... if u read this .. then say this aloud .. GRAPES ARE SOUR:D)
cmin back to my struggle to get into a b school ...my first innings got over on 5th feb 2006 when i took up my last entrance exam i knew the result before it was out... i had no whr to join..i did get calls frm all those local b schools but i cudnot join em... naam bade aur darshan chote... (n look whos talking hehehe)
ok now it was high time i decide wat to do.... as tht was my first n last chance of doin mba as i had this time bound restriction laid down by family.. if i dont get admission in 2006 batch thy ll get me married.. so i had to make it.. tht was one chance i had n i lost it... slap slap !! i had another option .. my last chance n tht was Ip uni ... n can u believe wat i did with the form .. i never posted it :D infact i got the form aftr the last date fr fillin it was over.. pata nahi kya mann mein aaya i never posted it !!! i sound careless i know.bt deep down in my heart i had lost all hope of gettin thru ne whr...not tht my attempts wre half hearted or stuff... at times u know things wont wrk.. n i knew tht i wont make it this yr n i knew it well tht its my only chance..i was planin an alternative n kahaani mein twist... tht i ll tell later
so all in all summary of the above written tale is - i din make it to a bschool nor cud i blog ..
by theway .. i did register a blog last yr on rediff.. wrote one or 2 posts too.. bt then i got so busy (doin wat even i dont know :P)i forgot the password... i retrieved the password n later aftr sm days i forgot the URL ... ha ha ha.. yes this is how silly i can be and i sadly i m :(.
finally... ladies n gentlemen its time to applaud as i hve finally blogged !! n i hope not to forget my password or url ne more...
by the way all the URLs tht i thought wre taken . jus like good guys are already taken .. so i decided on this present name, becoz i m garrulous.. gregarious..chatterbox..!!!

now its october 2006.. i mno more in india..came here 5 months back :( n thr is no single day when idont miss delhi ...
my dear delhi i miss uuu shooooooo much . sigh whn will i get back to u !!
i m here wid parents now.. living overseas.this is whre i was 5 yrs back ie b4 i went to college.. i did my schooling frm here.. grew up here.. i know the local language..for sm reasons i wont mention where i m presently.perhaps in my subsequent posts i might write whr i m now..but fr now keep guessing
tonite i had really promised my self tht gullllllll.. no matter wat u hve to blog... i had in fact prepared a rough draft of my thoughts in my mind ..and guess wat happend???my mom hid the laptop :((
stop laffin .. she really did... !!!bt this din dampen my spirits.. i took up a pen n notebook n strted scrriblin all this tht i m typin now on tht piece of paper...
hehehehehahaha i m writing (yes actual ka writin all this in my diary n will type it whn i get the lappy back :D)
now u mus b wondering.. why was the laptop kidnapped..:(?ok so now i present to u the other side of the story... to begin with i m a night bird. i am awake all nite surfin reading ... chatting googlin n this is why i dont sleep be 2 or 3 and smtimes 4... :O shhhhhhhhh and the consquence is.. i wakeup late ..soooooooo late ...at times whn i getup i see my bros back frm school or everyones thru wid lunch too !ppl r hving their siesta... n thts my morning time !!i hve a unique lifestyle or envious i mus say.. wana peep into it? here u go...i am a sleepaholic... i sleep fr 10-12 hrs becoz i hve nothing to do ... koi kaam de do bhai !!
n i believe best way to kill time is to sleep... earlier if i wrent asleep i wud b hogging.. but tht too is passe now. i was asked to seal my mouth coz of my evergrowing waist size.mera raaashan paani bandh ho gaya n i shed abt 9kgs... :D( i did all this as i was told to slim down to get married.. )now tht i hve lost so much weight m still single... :D:D:D:D:D n i m more than happy ok if not sleepin or hoggin i hd b on net, or reading books or watchin tv or writing poems or lisenin to moojik..( some may wonder what abt frnds. well buddy.. i dont hve ne body or buddy as a frnd over here... its jus me n me alone... dont go out much .. no freakin out wid frnds. n damn i miss it :-( )
and yes in btween al this i do take out times to lay the table fr lunch dinner... iron the clothes.. cleanup d room , hang the laundry... thodi bahot saaf safaai and dusting shusting !!blabla bla
BUT .. I DONT DO MUCH OF IT ( AS ALL SAY )as expected of a good homely nice obedient girll..... so i am a bad girl :(the first reason fr me being so bad n infamous is my sleepin habit...the whole world has probs wid my sleep !!!jealoussssssssssssssssss ... fr them sleep is a luxury n look at me i sleep so much in one day jitna kayee log 2-3 din mein soteh hain
i dont sleep much because i hve no aim in life. i sleep alot because the moment i wakeup i realise no one will let me realize my dreams. hence i m better of sleeping !!yawwwwn. neend aa gayi :P
god this first post of mine seems endless.. you can blame my old habit of typin assignments fr it.. sorry..(y shld i say sorry on my own blog :-l... is ne one reading even ???)
neways fr those who read all this.. i can say tht u can cme back once in a while. i wont b blogging exclusively on me. i hve alot to share n discuss n explore.... this blog will express my perspective on little n bigs things in life
my next post will b a lil intro of me, my dreams and future plans(or i mus saymy future as planned by others !!!)
i will be posting my poems and articles...
n i hope to write much better n not brag much .wish me luck !